Funny facebook statuses and facebook quotes

User good statuses Jerry

Group:Humor
Text:
People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
Group:Smile
Text:
Girls are funny creatures. They hate it when you ask their age but will kill you if you forget their birthday.
Group:Bedtime
Text:
If time does not wait for you, don’t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.
Group:Humor
Text:
The human brain is amazing. It functions 24 hours a day from the time we were born, and only stops when we take exam or are in love.
Group:Humor
Text:
A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.
Group:Facebook
Text:
Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the music stops loading.
Group:Facebook
Text:
I am not addicted to Facebook. I only use it when I have time . . . . . . . . . lunch time, break time, bed time, this time, that time, any time, all the time. :)
Group:Life
Text:
When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
Group:Facebook
Text:
It is a sad fact that 20% of marriages in this country end in divorce. But hey, the remaining end in death. You could be one of the lucky ones.
Group:Facebook
Text:
I really need 5 hours of Facebook to balance out my 5 minutes of studying.
Group:Bedtime
Text:

So it's that time again, time to leave Facebook.
So I say "Goodnight, but do not worry I'll be back soon!"

Group:Facebook
Text:
The only thing I gained so far in this year is weight :)
Group:Facebook
Text:
You know how your not supposed to drink and drive right? Well, the other day I was riding my bike and drinking a juice box. I felt like an outlaw.
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http://goodstatuses.com/user/238/